you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
