Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
My feet surprised me
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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