I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
