I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
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