You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
