I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
