Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Randomize
