I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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