I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
