But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
