Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
