Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
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