I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
