If i come over, it means nothing
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
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