i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
