I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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