It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize