Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
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