Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize