So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
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