I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize