I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
