Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
