If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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