I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
