I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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