I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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