I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Randomize
