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at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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