My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
