Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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