are you so shy because you have an std?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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