I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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