When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
you would pick up someone in the library
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
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i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
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She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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