what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
