That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
