so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Randomize