Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
