Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
How does one acquire holy water?
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
