Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
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we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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