he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Randomize
