wat bout pragnant strippers??
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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