Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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