I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
of course. lets lasso hookers.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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