What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize