I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
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