im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
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