Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Randomize
