I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
