He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize