I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Randomize
